Thursday, August 11, 2016

Deep Thoughts, by Me

August 11, 2016

I guess it's time for my daily spewing!

Today I bring you my head. I'll open it up for all to see, put my thoughts on display for you. Ready? It won't take long.

This little gem came spilling out of my cranium yesterday:

"People who say they need to find themselves are full of it. If you sit still long enough, yourself will come to you, and it's gonna want answers!"

Now where on earth did that come from? Deep I tell you, deeeeeeep inside. It is definitely a statement on how all of my dreams and my daydreams have been reminding me of the person I wanted to be, the person I could have been, the person maybe I should have been, the person I am now, and the person I will become. 

The way I see it, many of us are physiologically flawed. Some of us are born that way, others acquire their flaws throughout our lives. I don't know which category I'm in (I can guess but I have no proof) but I can see now that all of the decades of my innards being screwed up had an impact on me in numerous ways that are just being revealed to me. This sounds like some serious hippie talk - to me too! - but I'm starting to internalize it.

Today's pearl is probably not original but..

"Be the light that you seek." 

Boy if that doesn't sound like a bumper sticker from a yoga studio or an ashram in Oregon, I don't know what does. I meant it in the best possible way - don't look to others to make you happy or enlightened, look within. 

Is all of this healing really revealing the person that I once was that has been silenced by the mess my guts made of my brain? Is that so hard to believe? Yes it is, I'm a skeptic, but I'll be damned if all evidence isn't to the contrary lately. I mean - WOW. I'm waking from a 30-year long nap, I'm a little disoriented and don't recognize my face but my heart is slowly revealing itself to me, and I remember a lot of things about it. 

In case you're wondering, no, I'm not high. I swear! Or maybe I'm just high on life, and how incredible it feels to be getting well and emerging from my slumber.


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